I just sent the two foster children I had home to Mom. It was bitter sweet. On the one hand Mom had not done anything to the kids, they were voluntarily placed but at the same time it is horrible poverty and I feel for the kids. Days like this are hard when I have to accept I can’t save them all I just don’t make that kind of money. My BFF is supportive, she knows the funk I go into when I give them back and tried to lift my spirits today by sending me a quick email. In the email she said “I lost count how many kids are you still in the running for?”
I had to smile and yet again I was sad to think the actual number. Currently I am waiting to hear from 2 sets of sisters in Michigan, one set of sisters in Massachusetts and one girl in Tennessee. I tell myself I am in the running still because I do not have official rejection letters. Of course in all reality I won’t hear from anyone at all. The problem with not being selected is that no one tells you, eventually you see a status change and that is usually how you find out. Some agencies take days…others months and all the while you wait and hope. I remind myself how much harder this would be if I was waiting for a newborn, well all right maybe it wouldn’t be but that is what I tell myself to get through the day.
What do I want for Christmas??? To be selected as a match!!